Haiku Revieu | Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Star Wars: The Last Jedi
★★★

Transitional film
I wanted more backstory
But I do love Porgs

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Rey develops her newly discovered abilities with the guidance of Luke Skywalker, who is unsettled by the strength of her powers. Meanwhile, the Resistance prepares for battle with the First Order.

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It's been nearly a month since I first saw The Last Jedi in theaters, and honestly? I still don't quite know how I feel about the movie. I know people who love it, and I know people who compare it to the prequels (which I think might be going a little too far). There were parts that I loved, and parts that I didn't like. I'm struggling, friends.

My biggest issue is that it very much felt like a film that wasn't vital to the larger story. A lot of what was set down in The Force Awakens seemed to be tossed out the window without much care, and I worry that Episode 9 will try to get those things back, making The Last Jedi this weird transitional film that ultimately didn't do much. Other things I didn't enjoy:

• The Canto Bight storyline. More Finn? Yes! Rose Tico? YES! But them going off and doing their own thing took me out of the larger plot, especially when it ultimately turned out to be sort of useless. (Thanks for nothing, Benicio del Toro.) Also, was there more to the woman (Lily Cole) standing next to the master codebreaker than we were privy to?
• Luke's snotty attitude (and the weird milking moment). I get that he wanted to be left alone. I get that he was reeling from Kylo's turn to the dark side. I get that he's always been a bit of a brat. But the jokey way he tossed the lightsaber behind him when Rey handed it to him totally diverged from the feeling I got from the end of The Force Awakens. It was jarring, and felt cheap.
• The cat and mouse chase between the First Order and the Rebel ships. Sure, it paid off awesomely in that kamikaze scene at the end, but what was stopping the First Order from jumping to the other side of the Rebel ships? Or calling in reinforcements? It's not like the Rebel ships were going to get away if they stopped looking for a second.
• Snoke and Phasma's seemingly useless deaths. Them dying kind of unceremoniously made it seem like neither character was necessary to the larger plot, and it's a shame. (That said, they might not actually be dead, and show up again. We'll see ...)
• And, related: The lack of character backstory. I try to remind myself that I didn't know much of anything about Emperor Palpatine when all I'd seen was the original trilogy; it wasn't until the prequels and the extended universe books that I learned more. I feel like movie-going audiences expect—and deserve—more these days, however, and inserting a new character (i.e. Holdo) without explaining really anything about who she is except a throw-away line about her being involved in some "famous" battle just feels cheap. (If you're interested, you can learn more about her in Claudia Gray's book, Leia: Princess of Alderaan.)

Like I said, though, there were things I really liked. A few examples:

• Princess Leia showing her force powers. Just 'cause she's not a Jedi has never meant that she's not a badass Force wielder.
• The character growth, Finn's and Poe's in particular. Finn's gone from being all about himself, to all about Rey, to a slogan-saying, full-fledged member of the Rebellion. (Total fist-pump moment, y'all.) And Poe was taken down a peg or two to show him humility and what it takes to be a true leader. (Just in time for Episode 9.)
• Representation for more than just white dudes. Anytime I saw a woman in a position of power—or, really, doing anything—I got choked up. Even at 34, I'm still looking for women to be major parts of my favorite
• The lightsaber battle between Kylo and Rey and Snoke's guards. Beautiful choreography! And, though I'm not a Reylo shipper, I love the enemistry between them. Their little mental chats were pretty delightful.
• Yoda's gleeful trolling. I didn't realize how much I missed that little green dude's sass.
• The Porgs. Yes, I'm one of those fans.

In the end, I'm giving the movie a three-star rating, mostly because I continue to waffle between one end of the spectrum and the other.

Have you seen the movie? What did you think?

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Haiku Revieu | Blade Runner 2049

Blade Runner 2049
★★★★

Pretty and quiet
Hey girl, we made a sequel
Ford is in it, trust

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A young blade runner's discovery of a long-buried secret leads him to track down former blade runner Rick Deckard, who's been missing for thirty years.

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Disclaimer: It's been a while since I saw this movie, so this review might be less articulate and thoughtful than it could be.

Until the night before we were going to see Blade Runner 2049, I'd never seen the original Blade Runner all the way through. I know, GASP. I'd seen parts and pieces, and read Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep (the Phillip K. Dick novel the movie's based on), so I knew the gist. But watching it right before seeing the sequel was a great idea; I wasn't nearly as lost as I might have been, and actually understood some of the hidden nods.

Blade Runner 2049 was a visually stunning movie, and really feels like an extension of the original, even all these years later. It uses similar technology, even though technology has changed drastically; I really appreciated the attempts to make it match, even thought they could have made everything much more "cool." The dated tech fits with the dystopian nature of the film. The sets and costumes also match well. The movie's treatement of women is somewhat problematic, but it too fits with the original. (Not making excuses, mind you. Just stating facts.)

Ryan Gosling makes for a good Deckard ancestor: he's quiet, reserved, and brooding, just like Harrison Ford's character in the original. It was also great to see Ford reprise the role, but Old Deckard kind of just seemed like Old Harrison Ford? Jared Leto was crazy, as expected, and creepy as heck as Niander Wallace. (Side note: I can't even imagine having to work with Leto.)

The plot held some twists and turns, which kept me interested in what is a very long time to sit in a theater for a movie that's not fast-paced. Honestly, my biggest complaint is the length of the film, and that's only because about halfway through, I found myself thinking about how long I'd been sitting there and the fact that Ford had yet to show up. It took me out of the viewing experience.

If you're a fan of the original or quiet science fiction films, I'd recommend giving this a go. If you find yourself thinking about when Ford will show up, please let me reassure you that it does eventually happen.

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | The Hitman's Bodyguard

The Hitman's Bodyguard
★★★

Deadpool and Windu
They drop the f-bomb a lot
Good "odd couple" laughs

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The world's top bodyguard gets a new client, a hit man who must testify at the International Court of Justice. They must put their differences aside and work together to make it to the trial on time.

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Disclaimer: It's been a while since I saw this movie, so this review might be less articulate and thoughtful than it could be.

The Hitman's Bodyguard is one of those movies that comes out of nowhere and quietly goes in and out of theaters. It's a bit surprising, considering the caliber of talent in it—Ryan Reynolds, Samuel L. Jackson and Salma Hayek—but I don't remember seeing much in the way of promotion before getting an email about attending a pre-release screening.

Reynolds being one of Colt's faves, we couldn't pass up the opportunity. And we both enjoyed the movie, perhaps more than we thought we would. Reynolds and Jackson played delightfully well off of each other, and their quippy dialogue was a lot of fun. Hayek's character was quite far removed from other roles I've seen her play, and hearing her curse up a storm while sporting a lot of (prison?) tattoos was great.

The plot was pretty standard for the sort of thriller/action movie that it was, but it had a few twists that made it enjoyable.

If you see this one airing on TV at some point, I recommend giving it a watch. (Though, if it's on cable, it might lose some of its magic with all the curse words dubbed out ...)

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | Atomic Blonde

Atomic Blonde
★★★1/2

Charlize is a BAMF
McAvoy's unexpected
Set in the 80s

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An undercover MI6 agent is sent to Berlin during the Cold War to investigate the murder of a fellow agent and recover a missing list of double agents.

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After her role as Furiosa in Mad Max: Fury Road, it's no surprise that Charlize Theron is an action star. And if you had any doubt, watching her fight scenes in Atomic Blonde will get rid of any doubts that might be lingering. She is impressive in the fight scenes, and knowing that she did a lot of her own stunt work in the film makes it even more so.

That said, her character (Lorraine) is not all that interesting. Which makes the movie suffer some, considering it revolves around her and her role as a badass spy. The movie tries to make her interesting by surrounding her with intriguing secondary characters, but it never quite gets there.

Speaking of secondary characters, James McAvoy is great in this film. No spoilers, but I like how his character (Percival) lives in a gray area and has, to use a somewhat problematic term, "gone native." He's fascinating, and I wish Percival and Lorraine had had more screen time together. I also enjoyed Sofia Boutella's Delphine and—surprisingly?—Bill Skarsgård's Merkel. I would enjoy seeing Atomic Blonde sequels with Merkel as Lorraine's Q.

The most surprising thing about Atomic Blonde was the time period—even after watching the trailer, I was surprised to discover it was set in the late 1980s, right before the fall of the Berlin wall. Because of this setting, the movie is very stylized and gorgeously retro, but it's funny how well it would have fit into the present, aside from the whole Cold War storyline, natch. (I want many of Lorraine's outfits.) The movie did a good job at keeping its secrets, too; most of the twists weren't super obvious or foreshadowed too clearly.

All in all, I liked Atomic Blonde, but I didn't love it. I think part of my problem is that I went into the movie wanting another John Wick, in which the main character kicks ass and doesn't bother to take names, while being intriguing and engaging regardless of a lack of dialogue. It tried to reach that level of entertainment, but just missed the mark.

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | Colossal

Colossal
★★★★

Forced to move back home
Gloria's life in shambles
Is she a kaiju?

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Gloria is an out-of-work party girl forced to leave her life in NY and move back home. When reports surface that a giant creature is destroying Seoul, she gradually comes to the realization that she is somehow connected to this phenomenon.

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Going into Colossal, I wasn't sure what to expect. The trailer doesn't tell you much—thankfully!—other than that Anne Hathaway's character is somehow connected to a mysterious Kaiju terrorizing Korea.

After watching the movie, the trailer definitely didn't prepare me for the film. But that's a good thing; it was really nice being surprised by the plot and some of the characters.

Speaking of characters: Anne Hathaway's Gloria is a mess. And as much as she has haters (which I don't really get), she's great in this sort of role. She's believable as someone who has no idea what to do with her life, and who's gotten herself into a bad situation, but who eventually hits bottom and fights her way back into control. Dan Stevens, who's quickly earning a spot on next year's Man Calendar with his roles in Legion and Beauty and the Beast, is somewhat flat, but entertaining (in, admittedly, a douchey kind of way). The real standout is Jason Sudekis, however, who totally caught me off guard ... but that's all I'll say about that.

I can't say much about the plot, either, so as not to ruin the fun. It's pretty simple, but had some twists that I didn't see coming. It took me quite a while after seeing it to decide how I felt about the movie. I've finally decided, nearly a month later, that I really liked it.

I think.

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | The Magnificent Seven

The Magnificent Seven
★★★

Rifles-a-blazin'
Accurately diverse cast
Lack of backstory

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Seven gun men in the old west gradually come together to help a poor village against savage thieves.

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I've never seen the original The Magnificent Seven—nor Seven Samurai—but I was excited about this movie, regardless, from the first trailer. I mean, that cast!

However, though the cast was great, and the movie itself decently entertaining, I didn't love it as much as I had hoped.

My main dislike stems from the fact that there wasn't a whole lot of backstory explaining the characters' actions or the larger plot of the movie. I mean, I could make inferences in many cases, and my imagination filled in many of the holes from the little information we did get, but I never really connected with any of the characters or their motivations. And in some cases, the backstory came too late to make much of a difference.

That said, I thought the cast—specifically the diversity of the cast—was great. Denzel Washington's Sam Chisolm is a great, soft-spoken leader; Chris Pratt's Josh Faraday is a delightfully snarky ne'er-do-well (think Peter Quill in the old west); Vincent D'Onofrio's Jack Horne is crazy personified (with a seriously bizarre way of speaking); and Peter Sarsgaard's Bartholomew Bogue was thisclose to being a joke, but his quiet demeanor made his over-the-top villainy that much more real. The supporting cast were great at their roles, too, and let's just say that Martin Sensmeier's Red Harvest wasn't hard on the ol' eyes.

According to Colt, it was a really good example of a "standard" western film, and I'll be the first to admit that I'm not well-versed in the genre, so take all this with a grain of salt. I don't feel like I needed to see this one in theaters, but don't feel like it was a waste to have done so either.

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | Independence Day: Resurgence

Independence Day: Resurgence
★★★

Aliens return
Where's Will Smith when we need him
At least we have Jeff

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Two decades after the first Independence Day invasion, Earth is faced with a new extra-Solar threat. But will mankind's new space defenses be enough?

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Thanks to having an awesome movie theater chain in our area (the Alamo Drafthouse—seriously, we're so spoiled), we often get to attend unique theater experiences in addition to normal ones. A couple of weeks ago, we got to attend one of the former, with a double feature of Independence Day and Independence Day: Resurgence.

Now, I adore Independence Day. It's such a classic—which I can say now that's it's 20 years old *sigh*—and features my favorite fictional president and one of the best movie speeches of all time. So going into the double feature, I knew that regardless of how good the sequel might be, it would be tempered by watching the original just prior.

Suffice it to say, the sequel might have actually been helped by the fact that I was still riding the high from the original while watching it. It's not that it wasn't entertaining, because it was, in the way that every movie filled with high-stakes action and explosions is entertaining. (I have simple tastes.) But the "new" characters didn't have nearly as much charm as the originals. Specifically Jessie T. Usher's Dylan Hiller—the grown-up version of Vivica A. Fox's kiddo from the first movie—and Liam Hemsworth's Jake Morrison, a totally new character who is basically every role Liam's ever played in a movie, except this one gets to hang out in space. Jessie was extremely wooden, and Liam is, well, Liam (i.e., the human equivalent of the word fetch).

I was also super disappointed in Sela Ward's President Lanford. Lady had some big shoes to fill, and she totally let me down.

It was great to see Jeff Goldblum back as David Levinson, however. That man has some SERIOUS swagger, both in literal walk and portraying of characters. I was excited, too, to see Brent Spiner revisit his role as the wacky Doctor Dr. Brakish Okun, mostly because I'm always going to root for anyone from Star Trek: The Next Generation when they show up on my movie/TV screens, but also because I thought he died in the first movie?

The plot of the movie actually surprised me, and in a positive way. It was much more story-driven than the original, and gave a good amount of background as to the aliens' reasons for invading Earth in the first place. (I'm being purposefully vague as to avoid spoilers, natch.) These new reveals felt a tad shoehorned, but I would be lying to say that I wasn't intrigued by what was revealed. I don't know if there will be another addition to the franchise in the future, but this movie left it wide open for more.

This is one of those reboot movies that won't ruin your childhood, but isn't really one you need to rush to theaters to see.

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | X-Men: Apocalypse

X-Men: Apocalypse
★★★ 3/4

Lots of blue mutants
The Big Bad isn't big or bad
I want Storm's mohawk

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With the emergence of the world's first mutant, Apocalypse, the X-Men must unite to defeat his extinction level plan.

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I've been a fan of the X-Men for a long time, since I was little and watched the cartoon as often as it was on. So I have a soft spot in my heart for these characters, albeit one that's been bruised before (*cough*worstmovieever*cough*).

The most recent movies in the franchise—First Class, Days of Future Past, even The Wolverine—have all been really great. And they've helped that bruised spot in my heart heal, thanks the timey wimey business of reboots. TL;DR: I went into this latest movie, Apocalypse, hoping it would continue the trend.

Sadly, although it didn't cause me any heartache, it also doesn't stand up to the quality of its immediate predecessors.

In an oddly prescient joke, which I assume was a dig aimed at The Last Stand, one of the characters in the movie mentions that "the third movie is always the worst."... Apocalypse is the third movie in this reboot of the franchise. After watching the film, I find it ironic that the joke also applies to the very movie in which it was said.

It's not that the movie is bad, per se. It's just a little boring? Even with all of the action and fight scenes and explosions—seriously, this movie rivals Man of Steel in unnecessary destruction of property—there's not a whole lot of plot. Apocalypse is this supremely overpowered being that is a threat to the entire world, but he's taken down in a matter of moments after spending much of the movie outfitting (literally, he makes costumes and applies tattoos) his team. Oscar Issac's talents are wholly wasted on the role.

And then there's the rest of the cast, many of whom—and I'm particularly pointing fingers at Jennifer Lawrence's Raven/Mystique—seemed to be phoning in their roles. Apocalypse is a somewhat serious movie, I get that. But couldn't they have at least a little fun with it? The exception, not unexpectedly, lies with Evan Peters' Peter/Quicksilver. I'd watch a whole movie made of his slowed down time scenes. Also, James McAvoy looks damn good in lavender.

Even the introduction of a whole slew of "new" mutants, including Jean Grey (Sophie Turner), Cyclops (Tye Sheridan), Storm (Alexandra Shipp), Nightcrawler (Kodi Smit-McPhee), Angel (Ben Hardy), Psylocke (Olivia Munn) and Jubilee (Lana Condor), didn't add much to the movie. All of the roles came off as terribly young-feeling, which, of course, means there's room to grow in future movies, but didn't quite mesh well with the more familiar feel of the already established crew.

This film felt a whole lot like a transition, bridging the gap from First Class and Days of Future Past to future movies in which the young team introduced in this movie grows into their X-Men personas. Which, again, is totally OK, but just doesn't make for the most engrossing of viewing experiences.

Check it out:

Previously, in this franchise:

• X-Men Days of Future Past
• X-Men: First Class

Note: Both links will take you to my old blog.

Haiku Revieu | Kingsman: The Secret Service

Kingsman: The Secret Service
★★★★

Comic book James Bond
Darcy is an action star
So many fun suits

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A spy organization recruits an unrefined, but promising street kid into the agency's ultra-competitive training program, just as a global threat emerges from a twisted tech genius.

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WARNING: Possible spoilers ahead.

This review is very late—two months to the day that I actually saw this movie. But it might help you decide if you want to watch it when it becomes available on demand/on Netflix/at a Redbox?

I was excited to see this movie before it came out, thanks in part to the combination of Colin Firth and Matthew Vaughn (who's had a hand in movies such as X-Men: First Class and X-Men: Days of Future Past). Colin is, well, Colin—how can you not love the man who's played roles such as Mr. Darcy, Mark Darcy and Jaime (Love Actually)—and Matthew Vaughn has a great track record of doing comics justice on the big screen.  Also: How has Colin Firth never been in an action movie? He was absolutely delightful as the James Bond-ish Harry Hart. Taron Edgerton, who plays the movie's "unrefined, but promising street kid" recruit, also does a fabulous job. I see big things in his future.

I've never read the comics that this movie is based on, but the idea of a secret British government agency who use fancy gadgets and are impeccably trained is a fun one, if not completely unique. But this isn't your typical James Bond story; it's much less serious and much more ridiculous—particularly the fight scenes. As someone who gets a huge kick out of over-the-top action scenes, however, the ridiculousness is a major pro rather than a con.

There's one major flaw to the movie that left a bit of a bad taste in my mouth, and that's an uncomfortable sexual encounter that happens near the end. I'm sure it was meant as an edgy nod to the idea of Bond Girls, but it just seemed crass and out of place in an otherwise fun movie.

Still, I'd recommend Kingsman to anyone who enjoys comic adaptations/action movies. Just don't bring the (young) kids.

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | The DUFF

The DUFF
★★★★

Mae's a total gem
It's OK to be a DUFF
Yay for teen movies

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A high school senior instigates a social pecking order revolution after finding out that she has been labeled the DUFF (Designated Ugly Fat Friend) to her prettier, more popular friends.

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WARNING: Possible spoilers ahead.

There's something special about the classic "ugly duckling turns beautiful swan story," and there are many great instances of this sort of theme in popular culture, particularly in teen movies. (She's All That is a shining example from my actual teen years.) In the case of The DUFF, however, the trope is turned slightly on it's head, and in a very fun way.

The movie, which is based on a book by the same name by Kody Keplinger, is the story of Bianca, who finds out that she's the "DUFF" of her friends. (Even though she's neither fat nor ugly.) This discovery leads to her wanting to change and needing to do the unspeakable—i.e., play nice with the most popular guy in school, Wesley—to make that change. In the end, however, Bianca realizes that everyone has their DUFF qualities, and that's not actually a bad thing.

Mae Whitman, who plays Bianca, is an absolute delight. She adds an amazing amount of sass and silliness to a role that could have gotten stereotypical super fast. Robbie Amell, who plays Wesley, does well as both the man-whorish dumb jock and the surprisingly sweet guy. (Since they're both 26, they're obviously not teenagers, but this is pretty typically Hollywood these days.) The cast that backs up these two leads—Allison Janney and Ken Jeong, among others—are fantastic, too.

And although the whole idea of a DUFF makes me cringe a little (I understand wanting to take the term back in a good way, but it's still kind of awful), the movie's underlying message is a great one: Be who you are, regardless of what others think or say about it. Even at 31, I still appreciate hearing this sort of thing.

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | Into the Woods

Into the Woods
★★★3/4

Woods are dangerous
Be careful what you wish for
Love Meryl's blue hair

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A witch tasks a childless baker and his wife with procuring magical items from classic fairy tales to reverse the curse put on their family tree.

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WARNING: Possible spoilers ahead.

I love musicals. (See: My excitement over Galavant.) But I don't often see them in the actual theater (i.e., live action), so I have to wait until they're adapted for film. And then, it's a bit of a crap shoot whether they'll be good adaptations or poor ones. I'm not sure where the film version of Into the Woods falls on that spectrum—if you've seen the musical live, do speak up!—but I know that it was a pretty fun time at the movies, regardless.

Into the Woods features a spectacular cast who, surprisingly in some cases, can sing quite well. Meryl Streep was fantastic, and dang did she look gorgeous as the prettier version of the witch. (Love that blue hair!) I adore Anna Kendrick, and am always glad when she sings in a role. Emily Blunt and James Corden, as the baker's wife and baker, respectively, played off of each other nicely. As Mr. Wolf, Johnny Depp once again the creepy type a little too well. (But he's still sexy doing so! Even in wolf makeup.) And Chris Pine was hilariously smarmy as Prince Charming. I did not, however, enjoy Lilla Crawford as Little Red Riding Hood. There's just something about her/the way she acted in the role that rubbed me the wrong way.

I would have liked more humor in the movie, however. There was a bit—the song between the two princes was particularly awesome—but the rest of the movie was more serious than I was expecting, especially after how over-the-top many of the characters were. The movie also drug on a little; I actually thought it was over before the whole giant business began.

I'm all for more musicals hitting (film) theaters, though, so the more power to this movie to do well.

Check it out:

Haiku Revieu | Interstellar

Interstellar
★★★3/4

Mankind's last, best hope
Other planets are scary
Team TARS forever

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A team of explorers travel through a wormhole in an attempt to find a potentially habitable planet that will sustain humanity.

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WARNING: Possible spoilers ahead.

The Mister has been excited about Interstellar since the very first time he heard that this was going to be a movie. He's a huge fan of Chris Nolan's work, and space movies, too. I was looking forward to seeing it, but didn't really have any hopes, high or low. I loved Inception, but I fell asleep the only time I've ever tried to watch Memento. Boy, was that ever confusing.

So, the weekend Interstellar opened (Yes, back in November. I'm a bit slow.), we ventured to the theater. I wasn't sure what to think, really, about the movie right after it ended, and month later, I'm still not sure. (The Mister would rate it ****1/2, in case you were curious.) The movie's premise is interesting for sure: Humanity's last hope is venturing to the stars to find a new place for us to live. Unsurprisingly, the mission goes a little awry #becausehumanity. And then it ends up in a black hole, which is where the movie kind of lost me.

I'll put this in white text because it's definitely a spoiler (highlight if you'd like to read it): I'm OK with the idea of the weird space/time construct in the black hole. But I don't understand why, if humanity could figure out how to build multiple fantastic space stations, they never went looking for the team? It was something like 80 years, right? That's a long time filled with obvious technological advances for them to just leave the team for dead.

That said, the cast was great. I will forever adore Michael Caine, and Matthew McConaughey—as much as I can't get that one story from ages ago that he doesn't like to wear deodorant out of my head, so I cringe every time he gets close to someone onscreen—is definitely a movie star. The surprise cameos, which I won't spoil here, were also fun. The standout star, however, was totally TARS—the marine robot with the wicked sense of humor/timing. Not only was his personality great, but his design was inspired. It's refreshing to see a robot that's not vaguely humanoid in shape. It was a little jarring to connect the very human voice with the very non-human shape, but I got mostly used to it by the end of the film. (Related: I just found this interview with David Gyasi, who plays Romilly, in which he says that TARS was (mostly) real, rather than being CGI. How cool is that?)

The sets/CGI also blew me away, which isn't surprising after having seen the likes of Inception. Nolan's vision for a nearly destroyed Earth felt all too real; the spaceships and space stations were both realistic and cool; the other planets the team traveled to were unique (and places I don't think I'd like to vacation); and the idea of a wormhole being a bubble-like sphere was totally new (to me), and yet made complete sense.

My overall view of the film is that it was very Contact-like. Started out super promising, but fell a little flat/got a little wacky in the end.

Check it out: